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Alec Dorf

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Recent Bloomfield Hills High School graduate, Alec Dorf, knows firsthand what it is like to lose a parent at an early age.


In late 2019, his mother, Lisa Dorf, became ill and was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor which necessitated emergency surgery. In February 2020, the cancer had progressed to her spine requiring additional surgery that would allow her to walk as she continued to fight this deadly disease.


The following month, the world locked down due to the COVID-19 pandemic and the Dorf family faced the overlapping challenge of isolation and end-of-life care.


“During COVID, there were no outlets or escape for me with online school and being home to see the progression and regression of my mom’s illness. I didn’t even have the distraction of being able to see my friends. None of my friends had been through this so they didn’t know what I was going through, and my dad was busy being my mom’s caretaker,” he explains. “It’s a gray spot to experience this in high school – it's not super common but not entirely uncommon either.”


Sadly, his mother’s health continued to decline, and she passed away in September of 2020.


Two years later, Dorf founded a nonprofit organization, The Lisa Project, to honor his mom and “pay it forward” by offering peer-to-peer mentoring and support for Bloomfield-area high school students who are actively experiencing losing a parent or have lost a parent due to serious illness. He acknowledges that the organization has helped his own grieving process.


“My mom, Lisa, was the kindest person ever. She was always thoughtful and there to help. Before I was born, she was a schoolteacher, so she believed in lifelong learning. She was always positive and smiled even during her illness. The nonprofit is a way to honor her spirit,” he says.


The organization recently partnered with The Lori Haber Buckfire Foundation to raise money for Planet Lori Art Camp – a camp for children who had or have a parent or close relative with cancer. Dorf’s younger brother, Zachary, attends the camp which is held at the Birmingham Bloomfield Art Center.


Following this shared experience, the teen said he has grown closer to his dad, Stuart Dorf. “My dad is honestly a huge inspiration to me. He works, takes care of me and my brother, and has such a positive attitude. He gets everything done and even does extras like taking us to Tigers games. I’m very thankful for him.”


The Bloomfield Hills resident plans to attend Michigan State University in the fall and major in social work. He said he would like to become a licensed therapist, build his own practice, and expand The Lisa Project so he can help more teens who are grieving a parent.


“I feel like I had to grow up faster than other kids my age. I learned a lot about myself – what I like and don’t like, what kind of person I am, how to be patient and listen, and that I want to help people. It also taught me to live in the moment and make the most of each day,” he explained.


For teenagers going through this difficult experience, Dorf offers this advice: “Take time out of your day to do something for yourself – even if it’s only five or ten or 15 minutes. Do something you enjoy, like going to the gym or for a walk, watching a YouTube video, listening to music, or spending time on a hobby. It’s hard to put yourself first but it’s so important to tend to your needs and mental health during this time.”


He adds, “Ultimately, I don’t want other kids to go through what I did. I didn’t have any peers to help me through my mom’s illness and losing her, so I want to help others in similar situations. I especially want other high school-aged kids who are going through this to know they’re not alone.”


Story: Tracy Donohue

Photo: Laurie Tennent

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